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Football

Patrick Towles has a Mountain to Climb with Sweaty Hands

patrick towles striker

Kentucky quarterback Patrick Towles had a hard time holding on to the football vs. Vanderbilt last Saturday.

The former Kentucky Mr. Football had 3 fumbles, losing one of them, and it was blamed on slippery, sweaty hands.

I have been researching ways that Towles could counteract his sweatiness and I have come up with a perfect plan.

Be a mountain climber.

Mountain climbers have to make sure they have the driest hands possible or it could be the last rock they see.

Here are the 5 WAYS TO KEEP YOUR HANDS DRY WHILE CLIMBING IN THE HEAT:

GOLD BOND
Apply some Gold Bond to your hands and then chalk up as usual. The idea behind this method is that the Gold Bond dries up the sweat and allows the chalk to more eas­ily adhere to your hands. This is prob­a­bly the cheap­est way to go.

SAGE TEA
Next time you’re at the gro­cery store, pick up a box of sage tea. The tan­nins in the tea are thought to shrink the open­ings of the sweat glands. Steep five tea bags in a quart of boil­ing water. Once the tea cools, soak your hands for up to thirty min­utes. Repeat nightly.

LIQ­UID CHALK
Rub the liq­uid chalk on your hands, wait for it to dry, and start climb­ing. On really hot days, it works well as a base. The ini­tial layer dries out your hands and then you can use reg­u­lar chalk as needed. Edel­weiss and Mam­mut both sell bot­tles of liq­uid chalk, or you can make your own by mix­ing rub­bing alco­hol and chalk (1:2).

TITE GRIP
Designed for golfers, but adopted by climbers, Tite Grip is an antiper­spi­rant lotion. The prod­uct gets mixed reviews for its smell, but the over­all con­sen­sus is that it’s so effec­tive you might not need to use chalk anymore.

ANTI­HY­DRAL
This is the most extreme (and expen­sive) solution.Antihydral was devel­oped to help peo­ple with clin­i­cally sweat hands, but it’s gain­ing pop­u­lar­ity in climb­ing, as well as in other sports. The only way to buy it in the US is online through a foos­ball enthu­si­ast web­site. Use it twice a day for the first two weeks, then apply as nec­es­sary before big climb­ing days.

Patrick Towles will need to have dry hands to climb the mountain which is the SEC and I am sure one of these remedies should dry up the problem.

Let the climbing begin!!!


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